THE HELL THAT IS MAKATI

Her apartment complex (Prime City Condohomes) is actually supposed to be secure, what with 24-hour security guards who are SUPPOSED to be roving the premises, and strict measures for visitors-- on foot or in a vehicle. But alas, not so. In my friend's eyes, the place should be renamed Crime City Condohomes since this was apparently not the first time it has happened. According to the head of their association, there have been something like 8 other break-ins in the same complex, in different buildings! Problem is none of the other tenants wanted to do the dirty work of filing cases and police reports. They just let it be, though whining and complaining like snobs. Not so my friend, who is a Zamboangena born and bred, and will fight it out till the end. She troops off to the police station to file the papers and put things on an outdated police institution called the "blotter". (Sounds so 19th century, eh?)

Not two weeks later, she returns to her apartment at about 10 pm, with a guy friend, only to see that despite a reinforced blockage to the aircon vent, her apartment's been invaded again. This time however, the culprit is still within the premises. Good thing the guy friend is there. Instead of violence, the thief runs. They give chase with raised voices, rousing the entire population of Prime City from their little holes. In a scene straight out of a Pinoy action blockbuster, the culprit is caught and tied with wire to a post, where he is beaten and humiliated by the very people he's been victimizing. His wallet contains proof enough for all of them: my friend's Metrobank credit card, from which the thief filched 11,000 pesos, and her gold necklace. The mob wants to gut him. But the police are already on the way. The bum is hauled off to the precinct where even the cops beat him bloody so he can spill the beans about any other accomplices.

The precinct is a whole new world. According to my fearless friend, one of the supervisor cops recognizes the thief and exclaims something to this effect: "Oh! You again! What? Stealing again? Drugs again? Hey, why is this guy here again? Why didn't the people who caught him just kill him? Tsk tsk tsk. More paperwork. Theives like that should just be killed. Wiped out. Hell of a lot easier for us to do our jobs. He he he."

The next day when my friend returns, the thief is asking for mercy. The NERVE of the stupid son of a bitch. As it turns out, the police are perfectly able to squeeze info out of the crook. All it takes is a few hours and some bloody fists and he confesses to stealing to supplement his income as a drug pusher. He even spills his address and contacts and the police are able to recover some of my friend's jewelry.

MOVING VIOLATIONS

Of course a week after the fateful apartment robbery at Crime City, a female officemate is walking down Sampaloc Street in San Antonio Village. It is 7 pm, and there are other people walking home, the street lights are on. It can hardly be considered a dangerous place to walk. Except that, out of nowhere, a speeding motorcycle with two people on it zooms up behind my officemate and forcefully rips her shoulder bag from her clutches. The man on the back of the motorbike then proceeds to stuff it into his backpack, which is open and ready.

The first thing that she is capable of shouting is "Bastooooos!!!!" But by then, the motorbike has rounded the corner and is out of distance. The second thing that came to mind was: "Walanghiya ang Erap na iyan! Dahil sa kanya, lumakas ang pagnanakaw!"

You can understand how the trauma makes her quite reluctant to get out of the house these days.

And then just the other day, I was going home in a jeep along Pasong Tamo. Being only partially full, it stopped at Makati Cinema Square, where a sizable number of commuters boarded. A couple of guys even made "sabit", hanging onto the outer rim of the jeep, for lack of space. Having nothing better to gawk at, I happened to train my gaze at one of the "sabit" guys. He looked relatively normal-- dressed in jeans and t-shirt-- a bit cocky and all. Except that something didn't feel right.

The jeep stopped near McDonalds at the corner of Buendia and Pasong Tamo, where it waited for the greenlight to cross. Once the light turned green, the woman seated at the last seat of the jeep started screaming and clutching her neck. The guy I had noticed was grasping at her neck too. Her necklace! When they realized what was happening, the other people near the end reached out to prevent the thief from getting away, but by this time, the jeep had already accelerated away from the corner. The thief nonchalantly melted into the crowd of rush-hour commuters.

* *

Nowadays whenever someone starts to tell me they want to relocate to Makati and be nearer their work area, I always tell them if they're sure they have the budget to do it right. Because if you don't have the big bucks to go rent (or buy) a place in a good area of Makati, you will end up living in the other half of the city-- the seedier part. Or at least, it may not have to LOOK seedy but it'll definitely be more crime-infested than you think. San Antonio Village, Rizal Village, near the Makati City Hall, Pasong Tamo, JP Rizal... Makati is an unkind place, I tell them. And then I tell them about the Crime City Thief and they believe me.

END

URBAN COMMUTER TIPS FOR
COMMUTING IN MAKATI JEEPS:

1. Never sit near the entrance. Although this is the favored spot, it is too easy for a thief to make off with your bags, celphone or jewelry if you sit here.

2. Look closely at your seatmates, each one of them could be a thief.

3. Beware of the old woman seated next to you with a kid on her lap and a jacket on her arm. One of her hands may be hidden underneath the jacket (and child) and may already be making its way into the handbag on your lap.

4. Don't ride a jeep and text. Text your friend once you get off, or when at a secure area like home or the office.

5. Be very careful of disembarking. When you get down from the jeep, you are concentrating on not stepping on people's toes, and then not ghetting run over by other cars on the street. Hands may be reaching out for your wallets/bags/jewelry while you are thus distracted.

6. For heaven's sakes, don't fall asleep.